Finding Societal Peace   

    People are passionate about their beliefs, and that's a good thing. It's important to know what you believe and how it relates to others. 

    Being closed-minded to other's subjective beliefs causes problems though. This happens when one holds onto their beliefs so tightly that it leads to contention and division. This contention leads to many societal problems and squabbles. There is a way out though: Being patient and open-minded.

The Problem of Division

    Division seems to me the greatest issue that afflicts modern life. There is a great entrenchment into beliefs that happens at a very young age. I remember one time in third grade I got into an argument over which president was better. Bill Clinton vs George W. Bush. As a third grader neither of us knew anything about politics, we were just reciting what our parents had told us. That's the problem though. We were just reciting what had been told to us. Nowadays, I'm far older with a greater grasp of 'knowledge' and supposedly so are my cohorts. Unfortunately, I see the issue just as much now. We all seem to pick our sides young and stay with them. We pick our favorite news stations and regurgitate whatever they tell us. We repeat what teachers and professors have to say rarely looking into the matter for ourselves. This is one of the great moral issues of our time.

    Allow me to highlight a common belief in America. America is officially considered a democratic-republic. This is the framework the founders set up to allow everyone in America to have a voice while preventing uneducated people from ruining the nation. While that is perhaps a crude way to explain the reasons, I believe it encapsulates the idea rather nicely. The way this works in reality is by the use of the electoral college. Average Americans vote on who to send to the electoral college, then the electoral college votes on everything else. It is the job of those in the electoral college to educate themselves on the matters at stake and then vote on how they would like those matters solved. Typically it works out that the elected representatives vote along party lines, but there is no law requiring them to vote a certain way. This is because the founders thought it would be better to have those educated on the matter make the final call. 

    Today, I hear all the time that the electoral college has no purpose anymore because the average American today is far better educated on the issues than they were when the system was set up. As much as I would like to believe this, I really don't. It is for the exact reason above that I wouldn't like America to become an absolute democracy. Rarely do I find someone who has a well-justified belief on political matters. Most of the time they repeat, verbatim, whatever their party's propaganda machine pumps out. 

    There are many other reasons that an absolute democracy isn't a good idea, such as the tyranny of the many, but that is not the reason I wanted to write this article. I simply use the example above to illustrate the point that in my observations, people don't take the time to think through their opinions and this is the cause for so much division. 

Why Defensiveness Brings Contention

    This is a strong stance, allow me to explain it. The groundwork for this belief rests on the psychological idea of a Schema. Schema is basically a fancy word for "how we see the world." They are generally linked to negative beliefs we have about ourselves and shape emotional responses in stressful situations. 

    For example, if I have the negative belief that I am lazy, then someone comes along and starts telling me that my house isn't clean, and I should work harder, and my wife is doing all the chores, I'm going to have an extra emotional response because they are reinforcing my belief that I am lazy. Whether what they are saying is true or not, it's going to reinforce my belief and I'm going to have an extra negative reaction because I'm already sensitive about it. 

    So, let's apply that to a heated conversation about politics. Two strangers on opposite sides both have the belief that their beliefs are the superior. This leads to closemindedness. Because neither one is willing to give up the negative belief (and yes, prideful superiority is a negative belief) that their way is right, they end up getting angry and getting into a divisive yelling match. 

    Upon analysis of this situation, we can see that each had a schema that their personal beliefs are superior and the other's are inferior. But why does this situation escalate? Well, the opposite person is reinforcing the other's belief that they are the inferior one. Then because of the prideful schema, they believe that the inferior should listen to the superior. When this doesn't happen they get frustrated and the situation escalates. 

    Luckily, there are some really good established therapy techniques to work through schemas. This isn't the place to talk about them, but if you're interested leave a comment. 

    The solution to the problem above is to explore your schemas. Exploring one's schemas teaches open-mindedness and allows for the creation of better relationships and interpersonal interactions. 

Conclusion

    I encourage anyone to take at least an intro philosophy class in college for this very reason. It teaches one to not only work through their opinions but to be open to differing ideas. Disagreeing is perfectly fine, anyone who's been in a committed relationship knows this, but it is closed-mindedness that keeps hatred alive. 

    Be open to new ideas. You don't have to accept them. Being open to them though will greatly enhance your life and bring about peace in your interpersonal communications. 

    I challenge you to read or talk about at least one opposing opinion for two of your strongly held beliefs. You may find it frustrating at first, but if you do it correctly you may just find yourself walking away with more knowledge and even a smile at the hardship.

    As always, best wishes.